In the previous article, we have already covered how the standard steroid drug test is done. I’ve also mentioned that you have to get all the information you can get about your scheduled doping test – when it will happen, who will administer it, and how close the administrators are going to watch. You also have to learn about the detection time of the steroid/s you’re using, so that you’ll know when to stop using them and if you really have to.
Once you learn about all this info, you can now choose which trick and technique to use to pass your steroid drug test. Each technique may or not work in a certain situation, so you have to decide wisely. You can also use several tricks just to be sure.
Now, here’s a list of the tricks and techniques on how to conceal the steroid substances in your body and pass a doping test:
- Use fast-acting oral steroids. Unlike long-lasting steroids, fast-acting steroids are usually in and out of the body in just approximately 24 hours and can be undetected by doping tests in a week or two. They are usually taken orally and are water-based in composition. Popular examples of fast-acting steroids are Anavar, Anadrol, and Dianabol.
- Use designer steroids. Fresh designer steroids are usually untested for, so they will most likely remain undetected during a standard steroid drug test.
- Detoxify. Using diuretics and drinking lots of water are two of the most common detoxification techniques. These methods dilute the steroids in your body and speed up urine excretion to flush out steroids and other illegal substances from your system.
- Use masking agents. As the name suggests, masking agents are substances that conceal the presence of steroids in the body. Diuretic drugs and herbs are the most common masking agents, but there are also drugs that prevent the steroids in your body from coming out with your urine. The downside is that new and improved doping tests can now detect masking agents, so you have to take those with the shortest half lives.
- Take epitestosterone. This, to me, is actually the most logical technique to pass a doping test. Since the standard test is testing for abnormal testosterone-epitestosterone ratio, you just have to take enough epitestosterone to maintain the T/E ratio acceptable. A popular example is how “The Clear” and “The Cream” worked. They maintain the normal T/E ratio even though the individual levels of these two hormones are elevated.
- Use another person’s urine. This is the most common advice I’ve read in the forums, but also the hardest and most dangerous one. Before resorting to this method, you have to be 100% sure that the test administrators won’t be looking closely when you piss. An effective statement would be, “Hey, do you mind? I can’t piss with your eyes on me.” Or just pray that the test observers are homophobic or something. Also, make sure that the urine sample you’re getting is 100% clean.
a. Urinator or whizzinator. This is a package that includes a bag that holds a clean urine sample, temperature control to keep the urine warm, and a realistic prosthetic penis (which usually comes in different colors).
b. Tiny containers, like Visine. This guy in one forum said that he filled a Visine bottle with clean urine and taped it under his cock. He told observers that the whole situation was weirding him out so that they’d back off a little. This method can work if you’re really lucky, but under most circumstances, the bottle will just be seen by the test administrators.